Well, you can imagine the hilarity this name has brought to the humans! So immature… However, today was meant to be a trip up to Jasper, the Columbia Glacier and then the Jasper Sky Tram tomorrow. But as with all well conceived plans, nature got in the way. Jasper was evacuated last night, and not due to one of the VIPs legendary farts, but because of 🔥 Luckily one of the VIPs decided it was time to wake everyone up at 6am so we managed to find accommodation in Canmore – thanks to the fantastic Rocky Mountain Ski Lodge 🍺

Instead of Jasper it was a trip to Lake Minnewanka. Now who in their right mind would name a place with this? We set off still before I should have been on my 3rd breakfast and headed to the lake(s). First stop was Two Jack’s where we scared the living daylights out of a girl who missed the view and was instead looking at her phone.

Like all good Canadians I decided to toke up first thing in the morning whilst taking my morning swim. This is the view the girl missed whilst looking at her phone and walking in front of a car – but she had right of way 🤣

Just to prove that they were stupid enough to name the place…

We hadn’t been at the lake long before the humans decided to hire a motorboat. What could possibly go wrong? At least it was before they had started drinking today! You’ll notice that they all had life jackets, but you guessed it, I was excluded even though I identify as a human.

I was slightly nervous to start off, but when Captain VIP had got the hang of steering I was fine. After a couple of circuits of the lake we returned to land and set off on a hike despite all the warnings about bears in the area. The ranger said I was allowed to go so far and even swim if I was on a lead. The dog nazi even had a shotgun in case he met a bear, he did keep putting on the floor so I’m guessing he was from Quebec 🏳️

We hadn’t been on the trail long when I had to dive into action and defend the humans from imminent danger.

They were allegedly Long Horned Sheep, but I suspect they had come from another planet. At the end of the hike, and no bear attacks we headed to the Black Anchor – was that rhyming slang for Minnewanka. Now, I’m only a dog but a pub surely should serve 🍺 No, it looked like the fun police had prevented that too. However, not all was lost I ended up with an 🍦

We ended up back in Canmore and finally got to visit The Grizzly Paw. The patio was great apart from the family with far too many semen demons who had taken the chairs from all the tables and then announced they were there to bother god.

It’s the VIPs 30th wedding anniversary today. 30 years. I got less for biting a drama teacher! Just to make sure they had no romantic plans for the evening, I’m here to keep an eye on them!